Dear Mr. Elevator Man

Two things that I know for sure will happen in life. You are born and you will die. Death .... I have had some rough dealing with death when it comes to family. My grandfather on my dad side, moved to TX and had a heart attack. It was a closed casket - and it didn't fully hit me until I was about 16 and I saw a man that looked just like him. I waved at the man and the man waved back. I LITERALLY was about to walk over to him. Then the flood gates opened and I cried a solid week in my room. He was my pen-pal, first person to put sugar on my popcorn -which my siblings and I do to this day , debate with me, and so forth. It just didn't seem real, because I didn't see him again. I didn't SEE him in the casket, but I knew he was in the casket. My grandmother on my dad side passed away from breast cancer and a tumor ( if i'm not mistaken ). I was there the entire ordeal. From her being mobile to just laying in the bed making noises. I was in the room when she passed. ...

I have seen the above question quite a few times over the last week so I thought, hey why not speak on it! Hello, my name is Shanice and I am a plate fixer.

Yeah I forgot what number this is but it's a new year so let's start off with #1 umkay! 1. Ladies, if you man asked you to stop wearing that moo moo out in public like a dress, BIH STOP WEARING IT. I know we like to be comfortable, but come on nah ..... they way you get them is the way you keep them. I have a FEW period only outfits but they are tucked away and do NOT make it out the house. I am tired of seeing you with your Madam dress on and you man looking FINE at the movies. Just no .... 2. Baby hair ... can we let this go already? I'm so tired of you'll stretching that baby hair swoop all the way out on these sew ins. Push that shit back man and keep it pushing. Got dried up gel touching your eyebrows and shit. NO. Drop the tooth brush and walk away. 3. Men .... Please help me understand why you have on a long sleeve shirt, a pull over, and a jacket but you are still sagging? Like is your ass not cold? You just gone leave your ass out there to 'fend for i...

I really want to tell my boyfriend to take his belt off and give it to you. Why is your child IN the bathroom tissue section, knocking everything on the floor? When your OTHER child don' got a chair and push the bathroom tissue out the way so he can sit under it. AND you are just moving right along like this is normal. Giiiiirrrrrllllll,

Hello, my name is D and I am bisexual.  I told my mom and she cried.

No, seriously .. I have nothing to talk about today. The weird part is I actually sung the title in my Tina Turner voice. * starts rocking my shoulders * I have three back to back meetings in 10 minutes, so let's knock this out AIGHT! 1. Support black businesses. These are usually the first places to hire US! I hate to see people try to knock other people down because they aren't doing shit. There is clothing store in my hometown that is doing very well for themselves and people STAY trying to go at them. I've been in there a few times, but until I get this weight up off me ... ummm shawty can't wear nothing in there. But it's cute tho!!  2. STFU sometimes! GAH DAMN! Sorry, I just needed that. I swear some of you guys just talk and fuss to do so. You know how your parents use to say " shut up cause nah you just talking to hear yourself talk". Oh , so ya'll trying to say that was just my mama? Whatever ... 3. Last but not least ... if you a...

Well hello there!! Before we get into today's post, which is a little long, I just wanted to say my lunch sucked ASS!!! I'm having a no meat during work hours week and this wheat pasta stir fry I made ... I know the devil sent his minion to my fridge last night and made this taste like this. I KNOW IT! YUCK! So let's just say I am ready to RUN home and JUMP into something to eat. I pray I don't get a hungry headache, although I can feel it coming. Anywho .. onward and upward shall we (: Many people ( like 3)  have been asking me about my weight journey. So I'm just going to share a little bit of what's been going on with me. While doing that I will also touch on depression, something I know about personally.

I am SO glad I prerecorded these videos because end of the month is here at work and I'm DROWNING. Anywho ... Check out the reader letters for this week. Letter #1 : Nosey Roomate wants to break up his roommates relationship so he can date the girl. Letter #2 : The girlfriend doesn't like the boyfriends daughter, but doesn't have a legit reason on why. CCCCCCCHHHHHHIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEE .... Also check out my VMA Review ... Until next time .... If  you know that 2+2=4, why can't you figure out that my business DOES NOT include YOU ...

WHEW! Miss me? Last week was too much for me and I needed to step away. I won't go into detail about it here but just know I am upset! ONWARD AND UPWARDS SHALL WE!! Time for an Ask Shanice Week! Bring some humor back to the blog and get so of you'll together(and me caught up) with these emails. Caught it below : Dear Shanice, I enjoy your blog and hope that you can help me. (Don't they all chile .. )  I started dating a married man about 8 months ago. He told me he was unhappy with his married life, but wasn't sure if he wanted to leave his wife. I went into this as a side chick, I guess you could say. ( No girl, I'm gone say )  After seeing him for a few months he told me he would leave his wife for me and wanted to start a family soon. I was so excited because I had grown to love this man with everything I had. I move closer to his side of town, so that I could see him more, and he slowly started moving things in. I stop taking my birth control, and soon b...

So even though today is Vlog Thursday, I didn't make one :( MEH! I gotta get a new schedule. Anywo ... Here's an OOOOLLLLDDD Post from November of last year. Enjoy! Dear Jesus be a hair bow, I am ssssooooo tired of going out and seeing these children's heads looking like Helen Keller did their heads, while your swing your 20 inch beach blond body wave. I don't understand how you can come out of your house and your baby look like she played in a sand storm and you smiling at every man you see. GIRL WHET? When people know that you have children, they don't care what you look like if your child walking around with Albert Einstein sides. Is it so hard to do hair,and put your kids on clean clothes? OH MY SWEET SUGARY BROWN don't let me get on why your baby has a snort mustache going on!!!! I just need you parents to do better. Like a whole lot better. Like a thousand times a thousand times 6 more damn thousand better. So girl in the QT line, getting ready t...

Dear women, Why is it that we will drop our BEST girlfriend over something petty but let the same man run in and out of our lives? I just DO NOT understand that. I see it all the time on FaceBook. " look at us haters, we still pushing" But girl why are you still pushing? He had 3 whole children on your and you still "riding" for him. SMH. You'll give me a headache.

Listen, I had a completely didn't post for today, unkay! My mom called me still sick, doctors unknown of why her throat has been hurting for days and I have these two ladies in my inbox giving me a f'n headache.I'm an only child so when something is wrong with my mother it throws me into a mood. A "leave me the fack alone until my mother is better " mood. You know something like " I will curse each and every last person out in this place " in Jesus name, amen type of mood. Anywho this post is to you old bats in my inbox talking WRECK LESS!

Dear Threesome gone wrong, So let me just get this straight : - Your Boyfriend wanted to have a threesome -You agreed if you could pick the girl -You find the girl , do the deed, and that's that -You and the girl start messing around -Your boyfriend says he doesn't like the girl and tells you to stop hanging out with her -The girl is find being the side chick (smh) -She posted a picture of your ass on IG and some how your boyfriend knew it was yours Now all hell is breaking looooossssseeeee ... Listen here lady lover, I have no advice for you. Tell the truth and shame the devil girl! Who are you trying to be with? I'm so over you bi-curious people. If you want your boyfriend then leave Tinker Bell ass alone! Clearly she is just being messy. There are a thousand other women out here she can play with. Wait I didn't mean it like that. Never mind ... let's just keep going forward umkay. You just need to make up your mind who you want. If you really want h...

EEEEEKKKKKK 100 Days Of Fitness Starts on Monday!!!! Keep me in your PRAYERS!!!! http://www.pinterest.com/shuntelb/100-days-of-fitness/ Have a great weekend!!!!

I promise I am alive!! It's the end of the month and I work in transportation. Ch ........ I forgot to blog for the week on Sunday so FORGIVE ME!!!! Thanks for all the emails checking up on me. It's weird but I'm thankful! I have three new people that I'm trying to swing into this blog ...

Yup, I'm done. I am on team #rideandlive umkay! Live for Jesus! He died for all of us, so that we could live .... so I don't see the point in me,myself, having to "ride and/or die".

So many people have been asking me " WHERE ARE D'S UPDATE!!!" Well, sit down sit there and let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, there was a man who didn't consider himself bisexual, but liked men. Then one day along came Mellow Yellow! Oh this was a feisty queen,who always got what he wanted.

I'm just having a real shat day, so I'm taking a personal blog day to talk about me. Ya'll don't mind do you? First let me say Happy Birthday to an original MEM reader  : my cousin Tonya! I hope you have a blessed day! Even if you don't get everything you want today, thank God you were alive to see it. Check out her guest appearance on my post a while back here . You know what I'm tired of ? I am tired of people only "checking up on me" when they need something.

* uuuhhh do the humpty hump ha do the humpty hump * On Today's episode of "Ask Shanice and Friends" , a young lady would like to know how to move past friendships. Her best friend got pregnant by her very recent ex boyfriend. How can my ex boyfriend be my best friend boooyyyyffffrrrriiieeennnndddddd? * in my Sevyn Streeter Voice*

Missed Part 1? Look! You've made it to Tuesday!! Let's clap it up for that. ( insert emoji claps ) I've gotten through Monday and no one has died or been cursed out. Look at how amazing God is!! Umkay? UMKAY! Below I have my friends answer a letter from a guy with low self esteem. Brief summary : He's seeing a girl who is always asking him for money. He still lives with his parents trying to move out and she only dates "bosses" .... My advice is kick her ass to the curb. If you are a grown a$$ woman and you cannot afford your bills... hunny you don't need to be dating ANYONE! The second question is from a gentlemen as well. He wants to know what to do about his girlfriend who sells drugs. -_- He has asked her to quit before and she told him " a real man would be getting this money with me." Sir, send me your photo. I have single friends and single followers that would LOVE to give you a shot. Ain't nobody got the time to be f'n wit...