Dear Mr. Elevator Man

Why in the holly HELL would you want to squeeze your big body in with all 15 of us already on here. I HATE when the elevator is packed and that one person in the front says " Oh hey, we have room for you". No, NO THE FAK WE DO NOT! I'm already folder up in this corner like a fortune cookie ,with bodies touching my arms; and you want to add more people on here. Do you NOT see the sign that says " hey that's enough people on the elevator!!" Its right there!! It says "Minimum, 3 fat people, 2 medium fat people, and 4 skinny people can ride at the same time." Take that hamburger helper hand and put it back in this elevator or get the hell off. When you are breathing and you can see the person in front of you hair move, that enough people on this ride. Now all of you know we are in the death trap elevator anyway and you want to add more people to the ride down. Sweet baby Jesus, if you get me down safely I promise not to curse these people out when I ge...

Happy Monday Lovelies!!  So, if you have been here since day one you know weight is always on a sistah's mind. Remember ? So a few people emailed me about starting a weight lost group. Now I'm looking at my gut like these people must've lost all their marbles to Dora on their last trip to " who the hell do they think I am" land, right? So I reached out to my FaceBook friends and people stated they wanted in. So although I'm still scratching my head, I have a fitness group now!!! www.facebook.com/fitnessisstillsexy    This group is really just a motivational group. I know that it gets really hard trying to lost weight alone, when you feel like you are doing so much, but so little is happening. We will have 45 day challenges, prizes for who loses to most weight, and motivate each other to make it to our goal. I AM NOT a weight lost guru or trainer, so any questions about to much; your on your own. I just know what works for me and hopefully it will work fo...

Me : Hi, Can I have a Sausage Biscuit and a Hashbrown. That will be all. Worker : Ok so that's a Sausage Biscuit, Bacon and cheese Biscuit and a hashbrown. Would you like something to drink with that. Me : No, that's wrong. I want A sausage Biscuit, and 1 hashbrown. That's it. ( still in a good mood )  Worker : Ok so that's 2 Sausage Biscuits and 1 hashbrown. Does this complete your order. Me : ( over it at this point ) NO!! * leans out the window* I JUST WANT ONE, SINGLE SAUSAGE BISCUIT AND ONE ORDER OF HASHBROWN. ONE OF EACH. JUST ONE, UNO.  Worker : Ma'am please hold so that I can correct your older. Me : -__- you have GOTS to be kidding me Worker : Ma'am was that just a regular sausage biscuit? Me : Is there someone else in there to help you, because I'm not sure where we are missing the blue's clues. Worker : Excuse me? Me : Do you need me to pull up to the window? Worker : No ma'am. I have your uno sausage and uno ha...