Dear Can I Have My Face Back

I HATE when people stare at me and YOU MA'AM can't seem to get enough of my face. Now at first I thought, oh maybe it's just me. OH but no girl, it's you! I really would like my face back, I mean, God did give it to ME! If there is something that you need from me , don't ask, because the answer is no. Let's just run down a few things before I end this letter to you umkay?

1. I like men, so if that's the way your boat is rocking .... I hope you can swim, because I'll knock that thing over!
2. I do not want to be your friend. I have ENOUGH. Your weird and VERY ratchet. Plus your hairstyle reminds me of an upside down smashed cupcake.
3. If you think I'm stuck up and your judging me ...... I am and keep up the good work. :)
4. You wear your club clothes to work ..... I mean ... I just .... But maybe ..... DAH IDK!

Until next time,

Please tell me if something is hanging out of my nose since your all up in my face

Comments

Who's Cooking Nah?

Who started this cooking for your man is something that only wives do and not girlfriends? Do ya'll smoke crack? I'm convenience you early-mid 20 somethings smoke crack. I've seen a meme rolling around social media where the man says he wants to see his girl like this (she's cooking in underwear ... which leads to a whole 'notha story. Like I hope she not frying NATHAN!! Because baby bout to get burnt up trying to be cute.) and the girl replies "this is wife level package, you can upgrade your girlfriend package by buying a ring. He couldn't be me. STARVE THEN BIH! Listen .... follow me umkay? 1. NONE OF YA'LL (me included) makes enough money to eat at a restaurant everyday where the food is that damn bomb! Like you gone be eating Applebee's happy hour on the 4th day! AAANNDDDD ain't NOBODY trying to take yo bap ass out to eat EVERYDAY. Hoe I got bills to pay! Say it with me now ... I'mmmm oooonnnn aaaaaaa bbbuuuddddggggeeettt!!! ...

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I'm a ME kind of Mommy

I am a me type of Mommy. I pumped, breastfeed and formula feed my child. I pumped enough to store for future and my husband would feed him formula bottles when I was tapped out sleep. I am a vaccine mom. I say a little prayer before my son gets his shots each time and I watch him like a hawk afterwards. TO ME it is worth it. I am a cry it out mom. Yeah it sucks sometimes but it's worked out in MY favor. He gives me a smooth hour playing in his play pen with no interruptions to do whatever it is I need to do around the house. I am a cosleep and baby bed mom. Sometimes I just don't feel like getting out of my bed for night feedings so he sleeps in bed with us. Other nights I need some "adult time" and I kick his little ass out. LOL. I am a "his first pair of real shoes are white hard bottoms". I am a when the doctor says he can start eating food he ate everything! Fruits and veggies first and later meats. I am a google mom. I will google the shit out ...

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Check On Your Friends

So I had this whole blog written out in the shower about 30 minutes ago. For some strange reason I have been staring at this screen for 10 minutes with nothing to type. First let's talk about me, then we'll talk about you. Many of you do not follow me on social media but I am currently 37 weeks pregnant, still married, with a 20 month old. This second baby was NOT planned and honestly threw me into a world wind of emotions from day one when I found out. You can really prepare everything you need/want for your baby but still not be mentally ready. I, for one, am just now starting to get there. For the past few months I have been struggling with depression. I mean it was really bad. I didn't talk about it with anyone because honestly I did not want to hear any of the following : 1. You need to just go to church and pray about it. - FYI mental health is not something your pastor can scripture away. 2. You aren't the first person to have two babies back to back. - I ...

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Dear Mr. Elevator Man

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