Skip to main content

Dear Demetrius ... NOBODY ASKED FOR ALL THAT!

Dear D, 

Well MY GAWD .... you didn't have to wet me down with all that! You could've given me half the peppermint, like my Granny use to do in church and I would've been fine. But ooohhhhh no .. you just had to give me the whole piece of peppermint ... KNOWING GOOD DAMN WELL I was gone choke! Before I get to my part I just want to let you know the MEM community readers are HERE FOR YOU! I have been on conference calls, group texts, forwarded emails .. chile a bird came down and was like sssoooo tha fack is up with Mellow Yellow. So just know .. your strength cometh from these readers. :) 

Now on to you ..... I mean I feel bad, but I don't feel bad. From day UNO I told you to leave that slut bucket, but you didn't listen. Ok slut bucket maybe a little harsh, but again .. this my shit .. you'll don't pay these bills. Now you all in your feelings " but shanice I love her " . Well that's all good and well but YOU were already trying to get rid of her. Shall I point you back to email numéro un when you stated she was getting on your nervous? Yes be mad that she cheated on you, but also be glad she WRAPPED IT UP. Secondly you need to buy her a gift and send it to her because she honestly has lifted a load off of you. Lets not focus on er'thang she did, and lets focus on what your doing with Peter Packing A Pack of Peppers umkay! You like a man, but your dry heaving .. cause I know your ass ain't crying .. over a woman. 0_o 

How 'bout we do this : CHILL THE HELL OUT! You giving me a headache, seriously. This is the time were you need to get out of your feelings and figure out what it is you want. Are you really Bisexual , or are you just throwing a damn fit because someone fucked around on you? Its time to put away your spider man undies and put your solid color underwear on and figure this out. Stop texting Mellow Yellow because honestly, I think he is just fucking with your head. Be honest with yourself for once! 

xoxoxoxo
un-certified counselor 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Who's Cooking Nah?

Who started this cooking for your man is something that only wives do and not girlfriends? Do ya'll smoke crack? I'm convenience you early-mid 20 somethings smoke crack. I've seen a meme rolling around social media where the man says he wants to see his girl like this (she's cooking in underwear ... which leads to a whole 'notha story. Like I hope she not frying NATHAN!! Because baby bout to get burnt up trying to be cute.) and the girl replies "this is wife level package, you can upgrade your girlfriend package by buying a ring. He couldn't be me. STARVE THEN BIH! Listen .... follow me umkay? 1. NONE OF YA'LL (me included) makes enough money to eat at a restaurant everyday where the food is that damn bomb! Like you gone be eating Applebee's happy hour on the 4th day! AAANNDDDD ain't NOBODY trying to take yo bap ass out to eat EVERYDAY. Hoe I got bills to pay! Say it with me now ... I'mmmm oooonnnn aaaaaaa bbbuuuddddggggeeettt!!! ...

I'm a ME kind of Mommy

I am a me type of Mommy. I pumped, breastfeed and formula feed my child. I pumped enough to store for future and my husband would feed him formula bottles when I was tapped out sleep. I am a vaccine mom. I say a little prayer before my son gets his shots each time and I watch him like a hawk afterwards. TO ME it is worth it. I am a cry it out mom. Yeah it sucks sometimes but it's worked out in MY favor. He gives me a smooth hour playing in his play pen with no interruptions to do whatever it is I need to do around the house.  I am a cosleep and baby bed mom. Sometimes I just don't feel like getting out of my bed for night feedings so he sleeps in bed with us. Other nights I need some "adult time" and I kick his little ass out. LOL. I am a "his first pair of real shoes are white hard bottoms". I am a when the doctor says he can start eating food he ate everything! Fruits and veggies first and later meats.  I am a google mom. I will google the shit out ...

Check On Your Friends

So I had this whole blog written out in the shower about 30 minutes ago. For some strange reason I have been staring at this screen for 10 minutes with nothing to type. First let's talk about me, then we'll talk about you. Many of you do not follow me on social media but I am currently 37 weeks pregnant, still married, with a 20 month old. This second baby was NOT planned and honestly threw me into a world wind of emotions from day one when I found out. You can really prepare everything you need/want for your baby but still not be mentally ready. I, for one, am just now starting to get there. For the past few months I have been struggling with depression. I mean it was really bad. I didn't talk about it with anyone because honestly I did not want to hear any of the following : 1. You need to just go to church and pray about it. - FYI mental health is not something your pastor can scripture away. 2. You aren't the first person to have two babies back to back. - I ...