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Dear Demetrius ... NOBODY ASKED FOR ALL THAT!

Dear D, 

Well MY GAWD .... you didn't have to wet me down with all that! You could've given me half the peppermint, like my Granny use to do in church and I would've been fine. But ooohhhhh no .. you just had to give me the whole piece of peppermint ... KNOWING GOOD DAMN WELL I was gone choke! Before I get to my part I just want to let you know the MEM community readers are HERE FOR YOU! I have been on conference calls, group texts, forwarded emails .. chile a bird came down and was like sssoooo tha fack is up with Mellow Yellow. So just know .. your strength cometh from these readers. :) 

Now on to you ..... I mean I feel bad, but I don't feel bad. From day UNO I told you to leave that slut bucket, but you didn't listen. Ok slut bucket maybe a little harsh, but again .. this my shit .. you'll don't pay these bills. Now you all in your feelings " but shanice I love her " . Well that's all good and well but YOU were already trying to get rid of her. Shall I point you back to email numéro un when you stated she was getting on your nervous? Yes be mad that she cheated on you, but also be glad she WRAPPED IT UP. Secondly you need to buy her a gift and send it to her because she honestly has lifted a load off of you. Lets not focus on er'thang she did, and lets focus on what your doing with Peter Packing A Pack of Peppers umkay! You like a man, but your dry heaving .. cause I know your ass ain't crying .. over a woman. 0_o 

How 'bout we do this : CHILL THE HELL OUT! You giving me a headache, seriously. This is the time were you need to get out of your feelings and figure out what it is you want. Are you really Bisexual , or are you just throwing a damn fit because someone fucked around on you? Its time to put away your spider man undies and put your solid color underwear on and figure this out. Stop texting Mellow Yellow because honestly, I think he is just fucking with your head. Be honest with yourself for once! 

xoxoxoxo
un-certified counselor 

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