So this isn't going to be the typical MEM letter, I am REALLY about to just tell you'll how it all happened.
I AM OVER MEM! He is ENGAGED! Yes to the girl that stood him up, they haven't even "been together" for 6 months. Conversation below :
MEM : Long time no See ..
Me : I should say so ....
MEM : I have news
Me : * rolls eyes, pinches nose * go ahead
MEM: I'm engaged.
Me: 0_0 ..... to Jesus I hope?
MEM : No to ( you guys know her as Stand Up Lady, I won't put her real name )
Me : You GOTS to be smoking crack right? You on that meth? Let me see your teeth!
MEM : Whoa Whoa whats your deal?
Me : What do you mean WHAT IS MY DEAL! You are engaged to someone you don't know. I can't do this. Like I CANNOT do this. Why would you get engaged to someone you don't know. You are in such of a rush to "be with someone " you don't care who it is. Jesus take the wheel!
MEM : Why are you all in an uproar. I love her, she loves me. I mean she said yes. You are acting jealous.
Me : JEALOUS!! Lets start over ... YOU are the weirdo that started talking to me in the elevator. I didn't start talking to you. I didn't pour my social girl issues on me, THAT WAS YOU! Trust and believe I will NEVER be jealous of you. You are ALL OUT OF WACK!
MEM: I didn't mean it like that.
Me : NO NO NO! LET ME FINISH! I don't care about anything else you have to talk about. I don't want to hear about ANYTHING ELSE. When you see me in this building or anywhere else ... DON'T TALK TO ME! How DARE you say I'm jealous. You are NOT ready for a family. Get your head out of your ASS and see what's going on around you. She said yes because YOU ARE GOING TO TAKE CARE OF HER FOREVER! You travel for work, which means she doesn't really have to see you, which means " pay the bills and I'll collect the checks at home while creeping out with the lawn care man " ... Let me tell you what's going to happen ..You're going to get married, your not going to get a prenup, she's going to have a baby, and divorce your dumb ass and take ALL YOUR MONEY! Now yes this might not happen, but if she is anything like the other girls you've dated ................................ I'd say yeah. So the next time you want to call me jealous just remember, I'm in a loving relationship that wasn't forced.
MEM : Now I didn't mean it like that.
ME : I'm trying not to curse your ass out so please get out the way.
MEM: We need to talk about ..
ME : No, WE DON'T NEED TO DO SHIT! I just need to stay black and die! I'm still trying to make it to Heaven so please get the hell on ...... Find Dory, hell find a leaf off this tree to talk to but DO NOT TALK TO ME! I have a line of curse words ready to cometh out my mouth at you ... jealous, you got to be kidding me!
MEM : WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THIS!
Me: You have a better chance of not getting hit by a car on 285 right now then talking to me .. You got me aaaalllll the way messed up ...
* walks into the building *
Can YA'LL believe that shit?? I promise you guys I'm over MEM. Now what I said might be wrong but how can you get engaged to a person that clearly showed you they didn't like you. Mind you I saw the ring .............. It was FLIPPIN HUGE! Hell yeah she gone say yes. She doesn't have to work, just be a house wife until she has a child. ................. I can't. I CAN NOT! So I'm not sure if I will talk to him again. I'm not sure if I will see him again. I brought my black ass into work and clocked in. He don't write the checks that pay my bills, so I have nothing more to give. He makes my ass burn!! You only have to lick me in the face one time for me to know, I DON'T LIKE IT!
XOXOXOXO
Jesus forgives .... I plot ......
I AM OVER MEM! He is ENGAGED! Yes to the girl that stood him up, they haven't even "been together" for 6 months. Conversation below :
MEM : Long time no See ..
Me : I should say so ....
MEM : I have news
Me : * rolls eyes, pinches nose * go ahead
MEM: I'm engaged.
Me: 0_0 ..... to Jesus I hope?
MEM : No to ( you guys know her as Stand Up Lady, I won't put her real name )
Me : You GOTS to be smoking crack right? You on that meth? Let me see your teeth!
MEM : Whoa Whoa whats your deal?
Me : What do you mean WHAT IS MY DEAL! You are engaged to someone you don't know. I can't do this. Like I CANNOT do this. Why would you get engaged to someone you don't know. You are in such of a rush to "be with someone " you don't care who it is. Jesus take the wheel!
MEM : Why are you all in an uproar. I love her, she loves me. I mean she said yes. You are acting jealous.
Me : JEALOUS!! Lets start over ... YOU are the weirdo that started talking to me in the elevator. I didn't start talking to you. I didn't pour my social girl issues on me, THAT WAS YOU! Trust and believe I will NEVER be jealous of you. You are ALL OUT OF WACK!
MEM: I didn't mean it like that.
Me : NO NO NO! LET ME FINISH! I don't care about anything else you have to talk about. I don't want to hear about ANYTHING ELSE. When you see me in this building or anywhere else ... DON'T TALK TO ME! How DARE you say I'm jealous. You are NOT ready for a family. Get your head out of your ASS and see what's going on around you. She said yes because YOU ARE GOING TO TAKE CARE OF HER FOREVER! You travel for work, which means she doesn't really have to see you, which means " pay the bills and I'll collect the checks at home while creeping out with the lawn care man " ... Let me tell you what's going to happen ..You're going to get married, your not going to get a prenup, she's going to have a baby, and divorce your dumb ass and take ALL YOUR MONEY! Now yes this might not happen, but if she is anything like the other girls you've dated ................................ I'd say yeah. So the next time you want to call me jealous just remember, I'm in a loving relationship that wasn't forced.
MEM : Now I didn't mean it like that.
ME : I'm trying not to curse your ass out so please get out the way.
MEM: We need to talk about ..
ME : No, WE DON'T NEED TO DO SHIT! I just need to stay black and die! I'm still trying to make it to Heaven so please get the hell on ...... Find Dory, hell find a leaf off this tree to talk to but DO NOT TALK TO ME! I have a line of curse words ready to cometh out my mouth at you ... jealous, you got to be kidding me!
MEM : WE NEED TO TALK ABOUT THIS!
Me: You have a better chance of not getting hit by a car on 285 right now then talking to me .. You got me aaaalllll the way messed up ...
* walks into the building *
Can YA'LL believe that shit?? I promise you guys I'm over MEM. Now what I said might be wrong but how can you get engaged to a person that clearly showed you they didn't like you. Mind you I saw the ring .............. It was FLIPPIN HUGE! Hell yeah she gone say yes. She doesn't have to work, just be a house wife until she has a child. ................. I can't. I CAN NOT! So I'm not sure if I will talk to him again. I'm not sure if I will see him again. I brought my black ass into work and clocked in. He don't write the checks that pay my bills, so I have nothing more to give. He makes my ass burn!! You only have to lick me in the face one time for me to know, I DON'T LIKE IT!
XOXOXOXO
Jesus forgives .... I plot ......
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