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Dear Orange Is The New Black

If you are not done with Season II, take yo ass on back to the TV! This post isn't for you. Cursing below :) 


Dear OITNB,

You listen to me ... I am having with-drawls and I'm not sure what to do. My friend has sent me the 7 stages of how to get in through a breakup but I'M NOT ACCEPTING THIS!!! Why must you dump 13 episodes in my lap, on a Friday? Do you really hate a G, huh? I mean GAH DAMIT!! You have my emotions up and down from episode one. So let me tell you how I feel about this season .... other than I loved it ..

* I love Red. OMG, I love her so much!!! Last season, I was like ummm idk about this red head heffa, but I love her now.
* V, I hate that hoe with every bone in my body. She ain't bout shit, ain't never been shit, ain't never gone be shit. She is a predator and I hate that shit. Preying on foster kids to run her drugs. SHE FUCKED HER SON!!!! I mean he wasn't her real son, but FFFFFFUUUUCCCCKKKK!!! Then had him killed. OOOLLLL she an ol' bottom of the bucked two face hussey! I hate her. Point.Blank.Period.
* Piper is a mutha fucking G. I mean, she is everything I needed her to be in this season. She ain't no bitch. When she told Brook, she wasn't her MF friend, I said bbbbbiiiihhhhhhh .... gone head then! I just need her to be a lesbian. Like this back and forth reminds me of D. She gone always chase the cat. 
* FUCK ALEX. I mean I love her but these hoes ain't loyal. 
* Come here Tastee Gurl .... Tastee worked all the nerves I have in my body. Glad she came around. Like how you gone give the crack head crack!!! She showed me you can always get a fat chick to forgive you with chocolate cake and sprinkles. 
*Pouseey, you so GAH-DAMN emotionally. You thought you was just gone roll up on cuh and shot him. Girl, sit yo ass down somewhere. German Cat had you TRIPPIN! Let's not get on that horrid haircut they gave you for the flashback.
*Crazy Eye's bbbbbiiiihhhhhh .. stay yo ass over there!! YOU BETTER ACT LIKE YOU CRAZY!! I got my entire LIFE watching crazy. UMHM. I'm starting to think that you really don't like pie. You throw it at people a lot. I would NOT wanna be caught in an alley with you. Nah, I'm good. And why are crazy people so damn strong. I'm telling you, two people you can't fight are crack heads and crazy people. The strength of the Lord is with them. 
* Crazy Bih in love with Christopher ( can't remember her name ) ....... lemme tell you something, usually people stalk AFTER SEX! You aint even get none and you building bombs. GIRL SAT, YES SAT yo ass down somewhere. The hell wrong with you. Then you done took yo crazy ass to his house. SMH. See my blood pressure rising again, and I can't have that. 

Ok, I'm going to stop the list, because I could go on and on and on. So Thanks for getting Pennasky( thats so not how its spelled, fack off this my blog) new teeth, I knew Latinos where black people, Boo Bear weirds me out, I'm glad the crack head didn't sniff that stuff, one leg man is a bitch, when is the pregnant girl gone have her baby, I knew her husband was gay, if I was Piper I would’ve had my brother go beat the breaks up off my old bestfriend and ex fiancé, loved the bank robber, hate you guys are killing her off, the old ladies are SSSOOO GANGSTA, nice limit of cat eating & tits, and thanks for taking my weekend away from me. 

I F’N love this show! 


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