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#MCM I Am Losing Weight And My Boyfriend TOO

Dear Danny,

I have been seeing this guy for six months now and everything was fine until I Lost weight. Now every time I put something on he has to examine it and tell me what he likes or doesn't like or approve if I can wear or not. I have lost over hundred pounds in a year and enjoy showing off my new figure. I'm not that comfortable in my new body so I rarely wear anything that's mid drift but I do have a new love for tights. Now everywhere we go if a guy is looking at me he catches an attitude and tell me that I'm asking for the attention.

The other day he try to go through my phone and got mad because I wouldn't give him the password. He searches my social media and if someone comment on my Instagram and I comment back he starts to complain and state that we must be having sex. At this point it's annoying and I'm not sure if I want to be in relationship anymore. I lost my last trainer due to him having a "talk" with him behind my back and the trainer stated that he could not work with me anymore due to my boyfriends crazy antics. I have reassured him that I did not want anyone else and although I may look different I'm still the same person and I still love and want to be with him. Please help me because his new attitude is making me want to look at else where.

Thanks


Dear No Name Girl ( because you don't want your man to know its you because he reads the blog too),

First thing First, congrats on the weight loss. Even though I do not know you, I am proud of you because that is a hell of an accomplishment. Way to stay committed to the cause. Whatever that maybe. Secondly, I bet you real "TICK" girl. Esp. in them twerk team tights (shanice voice).I bet you aint poppin' for a real ninja .. My bad, I digress.  I'm sorry back to the topic at hand ...  Girl you should be proud of your body. You should be proud of them hips them thighs , wait my bad I'm slipping again. You should be ecstatic about your new body. You worked hard to get there. So what would be the point of doing it .. if not for 1. Health and 2. For other people to see it.I mean I'm not out here working out hard as fuck so that I can know I have abs under my t-shirt. I do it to be healthy and so that when I"m signing and take my shirt off all the girls can scream real loud. But again back on subject.  

Now let me put you onto a little secret. Guys are only upset when you lose weight, if their insecure. Now let me explain what I mean. 1. He sees your new banging body, he knows your body is banging. He knows other guys are going to think your body is banging. He's insecurities make him feel like 1.Too much attention from new guys might get his girl taken 2. He don't know if he is good enough to keep his girl. Ok your probably saying "aawwww that's sweet. He wants to be with me and doesn't want anyone to take me away." AAANNNNTTTTT WRONG. These are symptoms and characterizes that are going to lead to more problems in your relationship. He's insecurities want to go through your phone. He's insecurities check your social media. He's insecurities wants to pick out your clothes .. so no one is checking out your banging ass body.. you know what I'm saying (will smith voice) These insecurities lead to trust issues; as you can see. He wasn't having these problems when you were bigger. When A. he thought nobody want her ass but me  B. and I'm the only one that's gone want her. He should be proud of the way you look. He should be proud of your accomplishment. He should want you to show your body off,but in a classy way. I pick out shit for my girl all the time and it don't be no cover this shit up. He should want to go to the roof and yell out "ya'll see this bad chick I got with me right now". Amen. Hallelu! 

Oh yeah good job about not giving him your password. I heard some stupid shit the other day. A woman said the best thing to do is for the both of you to have each others passwords to everything. Because "THIS" will keep you on the straight and narrow. NewsFlash : If someone is going to cheat, they are going to find away to hide it from you. So you think they are going to cheat with the same websites and passwords they gave you? That person would have to be a dummy. Trust is not given, it's earned. What I mean by this is, he should trust you by your actions, by what you say, by what you do. And Vice Versa. Not because each one of you are able to check in on the other person all the time. The next step in that scenario is why you at the store? I thought you were on your way to Ray Ray House? Who gone be at Ray Ray house? Why You always over Ray Ray house? You got a bitch at Ray Ray House? I bet Ray Ray is really Rayvuan! It's called trust.  

Now let me give you a couple of solutions : First you can sit your man down, you can tell him how you feel, you can tell him how you think how he thinks is wrong, and how it makes you feeling inadequate and you are kind of getting sick of it. You can tell him this aint it, this body is only going to get badder. Now if he listens and he is willing to change, then ya'll can keep it pushing forward together. But if you think he is just paying lip service and not really trying to change ...... give him a couple weeks .... .see if he changed a little bit .... and if he aint ..... 


Because this isn't going to change. This is a character flaw, and will only lead to bigger issues down the road. 

PS : I got a couple homeboys that will buy you 3 or 4 pair of twerk team tights at a time. And let you go jogging with some headphones on and a sport bra. Give you a Gatorade and a towel to dry off. Stay Strong Girl

- Danny




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